The fascinating Marie Nicole from My Cyber House Rules is guest writer today. Fascinating because she traveled ten months a year as a race car mechanic. Marie then focused on roller derby. Now she lives and sails full time with her husband on their boat. And that’s just the beginning to what makes Marie unique. After you read about how she is now naked, please visit Marie’s site, follow her on Twitter, and friend her at Studio30 Plus. She is one cool chick and I am happy to know her.
My name is Marie. I’ve been blogging naked for one month. At first the breeze felt odd, but I quickly learned to love the feeling it brought to my newly exposed skin.
Kelly invited me to write a guest-post about how blogging naked changed things in my life. And what a wonderful idea that was!
I believe the first thing that happened when I put Nikki Rules to rest is I changed as a blogger. I became Marie. And by becoming Marie I started writing like myself. Not like the loud, brash and snarky Nikki. (OK, so that is still part of me, but not as much. I hope)
Blogging under a pseudonym turned me into somebody else. I know it’s odd to say, but there really must be something to a name. Nikki. I pulled that one from my middle name. As a kid I wanted to be called Nikki but it never took. I am a Marie. To the core.
I think coming out of the closet has forced me to clean up my act. My writing has improved. The content of my blog has improved. In the same time as going naked and coming out of the blogging closet I took advantage of the situation to undergo a a major change: I went from Blogger to WordPress. It seemed appropriate. WP is simply more professional – in my humble opinion. And in doing so I took out the trash. I did a first cleansing of my posts. Deleted many of them.
I wanted the capacity to use my writing for future professional endeavors. I wanted to call myself a writer and have something to show for it. Switching to WordPress from Blogger does have the convenience of easily transferring the content but as far as everything else goes – it’s like starting an entirely new blog. That part is still a work in progress.
I think the biggest change has been in my relationship with my best friend. I’ve talked about him before in my blog, but very little. I kept him out because he asked me to keep our life as private as possible. Which was the main reason for the pseudonym. I couldn’t expose myself without discussing it with him first. Actually in more ways than one he’s the one who brought it up.
The first time he did was when I posted 2 vlogs. He thought they were amazing and funny. “Why are you wearing a mask? Why aren’t you just yourself?” He felt the content was good enough for future use as I was in training to be a clown. As I started applying for writing positions, he again mentioned about linking my blog.
“I’m coming out of the closet. Writing as Marie. How can I talk about you?” He looked at me and shrugged. “Use my name!” I reminded him of his desire to remain private. We agreed that as long as I didn’t use my full-full name, and couldn’t be found in a google search under it – all was ok.
And then… everything changed. When I talked about my blog to him prior to the change he would roll his eyes. When I talk about it now, he listens with interest. When he’d see me huddled over my laptop he’d insist I spent too much time on it. Now he understands I’m investing in my passion. When I tell him how much I love getting feedback he reminds me that how I feel about my writing should be enough to know it’s good and that I don’t need to hear from others.
I’ve recently applied for a writer-blogger position. In my application I linked My Cyber House Rules. On May 25 I received my first award from a brand new follower, a follower from outside my usual network.
Blogging naked – an inspiration from Kelly via her title and her stories; from Lance at My Blog Can Beat Up Your Blog (little did he know how far that one post about being yourself would take me); and from Jerrod who let it slip how he felt it was foolish how people went through so many ways to change names… I thank you for inspiring me to be me.
I am Marie. I am a writer. I still dream of being a clown for the Cirque du Soleil. And no, I am not a monkey.
Timely post for me, given that I am still writing anonymously! I’m tempted to come out of the closet… but then I’m not. Thanks for telling us your experiences.
If you come out, you have to guest post here again out of the closet!
Brave Marie! That’s what I’m going to call you from now on. Or maybe “Radiliciously Brave Marie.”
It was inspiring to watch you go through this change, asking for feedback and help, via FB and S30P. And it’s great to see how liberated you now are.
To use some outdated phrasing: “You go, Girl!”
You’re a better man than I am, Marie.
But then again, I wonder if I would be more honest or less honest if I used my actual name rather than a pseudonym…
Miss Nikki, Nikki Rules, Marie… cat-masked clown lady… Regardless, you’re still one of my favorite people on the blogosphere.
It’s good to see revealing your secret identity has agreed with you so well.
I came out of the closet just over the past week. I’d been thinking about it. Interestingly enough, because of Lance’s post and your “coming out.” It’s strange. When you first start blogging anonymously, you feel this brilliant sense of freedom. As though you can say anything you want to say without consequences. But after you have said all those things, typed them out, gotten feedback, cleansed yourself, you just feel more trapped than before. Trapped behind a name that is not yours. Trapped behind a pseudonym you’ve created and now cannot claw yourself out from under. I began really writing again, REALLY writing, and my writing was being noticed and praised, but I couldn’t brag about myself or advertise myself. Because I couldn’t be myself. I just recently accidentally emailed my mother from my “anonymous” blog’s email address. I panicked, set my whole Goddess In The Machine blog to private and spent the next 12 hours with some digital bleach and rubber gloves doing housecleaning. Changed my blogger pic to one that showed my face. And plastered my naked self everywhere I could think of. Blogging anonymously served its purpose, but I am not that girl anymore. And I think continuing to force yourself behind a mask that no longer fits you does more damage than we realize. I, for one, am glad you got naked. It fits you so much better than the clown suit 😉
nice….your writing has improved i would say since coming out…ha…no really it has…too late for me i always used my name and never thought any different but it def comes with its challenges…lurkers and all…haha. err…
@ honest answer: it is very gratifying to come out. Actually just yesterday I met a local editor, send him a link to my blog and he immediately posted my hurricane article! That could not have happened before…
@ Eric: thanks, you’re like my big brother in this process although you’re probably like 10 years younger than I am! 🙂
@ Classic: I’m a better man than most, thanks for noticing! Ha!
@ Vinny: if you weren’t on the other side of the planet and married and if I weren’t on this side on the planet and married, oh the things we’d do! Like play wii games all day and compare playlists on our iPods (I can’t believe you don’t have an iPod)! hahaha
@ Deus: I did that too! Send my mom an email from my nikki account! You’re my sister sistah! We could compare notes about the whole coming out process… and I read the same article from Lance it’s what got the machine going
@ B’Man: You’re my writing god. To hear that feedback coming from you is like eating chocolate fondue on a week night.
@ Kelly – thanks again for the inspiration and the invite!
Cheers and applause!! It’s a hard transition for many to make. (I didn’t have a choice – I’m incapable of being anything but myself, and I just talk about my poor husband only rarely). I’m loving My Cyber House Rules. You are a multitalented pro with so many cool things to say!!
Hello Marie. It’s always my pleasure to listen something from you. And you’re becoming sophisticated…..cool 🙂
It’s dark in the closet! Glad you’ve outed yourself–loved your post! Well written!
You’ve given me some things to think about here that I’d never seriously considered. I’m going to have to find the post on Lance’s blog, too.
joie de vous